As Mother’s Day is here, I know it is challenging for us mothers who have lost our loved ones. For the mothers who have lost an only child, I know your loss all too well. It is the new normal that I have been living with since 2015. It is a life I never expected to live, yet here we are, seven going on eight years later. Milestones are hard. Birthdays, anniversaries, and even Christmases. But none so awkward as Mother’s Day. I hope my story will help you on your journey to embracing the awkward silence.
How to Embrace or Ignore the Awkward Silence
I remember my first Mother’s Day after my loss. Friends and family who once called or sent flowers and text messages went silent. I thought, “Am I on the Mother’s Day Blacklist globally?” (Lol). When I said “Happy Mother’s Day” to my family and friends, I received a “thank you” in return. So I asked myself, “Am I still a mother when my child dies ?”
Then the messages stopped entirely. At first, I was grateful. I began to embrace the silence. It was better to ignore the day entirely than to be forgotten. Then I thought about all the mothers going through a similar experience. What if they needed a listening ear or wanted to know how someone else copes with the awkward silence?
How to Move Beyond the Silence – Mother’s Day Reimagined
So you’ve asked yourself, “Am I still a mother when my child dies?” The answer to this question is simple: Yes! My child may be gone, and your child may be gone. But that does not change that they were and always will be your child. This simple truth makes you a mother, my friend.
So if or when the silence comes, embrace it. Do not let it define you. Hold on to your memories. Use the day as a day of self-care and reflection. Let’s reimagine Mother’s Day. Most importantly, from one mother to another – Happy Mother’s Day! 💜
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