The weekend goes by, and Fen and I never spoke of the pledge again. Part of me wanted to believe that it was part of a sick joke. Fen and I made plans to go to the beach the following weekend with another couple, Matt and Maya. Matt and Maya were friends of Fen, and Maya and I were quickly becoming friends. I called Maya to find out what she planned to wear to our beach outing. I wanted to coordinate our outfits because I did not want to dress inappropriately. Maya planned to wear a two-piece swimsuit and wear shorts to the beach. So I knew that my one-piece swimsuit and capri pants were a safe bet.
The Beach
Maya decided she was ready for a swim, so she asked me to change and go in the water with her. Since I love the ocean, I was happy to go with her. My capris were off in no time, and I was about to take off my shirt when Fen approached me. Fen asked, “What do you think you’re doing?” to which I replied, “I am going into the water with Maya, so I am taking off my shirt.”
Confrontation
I was a little puzzled by his question because Fen heard Maya ask me to go with her. Fen then asked, “Are you trying to lure men with your body?” Fen’s statement shocked me. I looked at my one-piece swimsuit to check if it was too revealing, and I somehow missed that fact. I remembered thinking that the swimsuit was the same one I wore on our honeymoon, but Fen interrupted my thoughts with a barrage of accusations about me trying to entice men and disrespecting him.
Fen went on to ask me if my behavior was that of a married woman. He finally said that I need to wear my shirt over my swimsuit if I am going swimming. I was utterly humiliated by his earlier comments to respond. I could see Maya approaching, so I tried to wipe away the tears and regain my composure.
Unfortunately, Maya had already sensed that something was wrong, so she asked, “Hey, what’s going on?” Neither of us spoke at first. Maya then asked, “Raine?” to which I responded, “Fen thinks that my swimsuit is too revealing and that I need to keep my shirt on.” A statement of truth but one that I would pay for later.
Beginning of Promises Kept
Maya pointed out that she was wearing a two-piece bikini and that her swimsuit was considerably more revealing than my one-piece. Maya even accused him of being unreasonable. Fen did not respond to Maya but kept his eyes trained on me. The look on Fen’s face told me not to comment on Maya’s opinion. I kept my shirt on and decided against going into the water.
If you or a loved one is experiencing domestic violence or relationship abuse, please call (anonymous and confidential) the national domestic violence hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. Advocates are available. Visit National Domestic Violence at thehotline.org. For immediate help, call 9-1-1.
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